Travelling for work can be a challenging yet rewarding experience for both the partner going away and the one staying at home. It can be difficult to adjust to a temporary long-distance relationship and manage the emotions that come with it, such as feelings of abandonment and resentment. However, there are ways to nurture your relationship and stay connected while apart. Effective communication, empathy, and creating rituals around travel can help bridge the physical gap and maintain a strong emotional bond. Additionally, the travelling partner may experience the glamour and opportunities that come with exploring new places and meeting new people, but it is also important to acknowledge the exhaustion and loneliness that may accompany such a lifestyle.
What You'll Learn
Communicate about how you want to communicate
Travelling for work can put a strain on relationships, so it's important to communicate about how you want to communicate. Here are some tips to help you navigate this situation effectively:
Define Your Communication Preferences
Before your partner leaves, discuss your communication preferences and needs. Some people prefer frequent text messages throughout the day, while others may find this tedious. Define the baseline of communication that works for both of you, and be sure to express your preferences clearly. This will help you stay connected and maintain a healthy emotional connection despite the distance.
Share Details of Your Daily Lives
Ask your partner about their work and meetings. By sharing the small day-to-day details, you can visualise each other's experiences and stay close. This also helps to avoid romanticising what your partner is doing and creating a notion that they are having more fun than you. Be sure to share what you are doing regularly as well, so they can picture your daily life at home.
Make the Most of Technology
Get creative with technology to stay connected. FaceTime, video calls, and funny Marco Polo videos can help you feel involved in each other's lives, even when you are apart. These visual forms of communication can bridge the physical distance and make you feel like you are still a part of your partner's daily life.
Schedule Undivided Time Before Departure
In the 24 hours before your partner leaves, try to schedule some undivided time together. This could be a meal, a walk, or a fun activity that you both enjoy. This special time will create a positive memory to hold onto while you are apart and strengthen your connection.
Establish Communication Rituals
Create rituals around your partner's travel. For example, you could establish a ritual of sending each other photos or videos of your pets, children, or fun moments during the day. Leaving love notes in their luggage or sending funny memes can also brighten their day and make them feel loved, even when they are far away.
Be Understanding of Each Other's Challenges
Recognise that travelling for work is not always glamorous. Your partner may be dealing with early wake-up calls, delayed flights, jet lag, and late nights. Similarly, the person staying at home may be juggling multiple responsibilities and feeling overwhelmed. By empathising with each other's challenges, you can nurture your relationship and avoid resentment.
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Ask about their work
Asking about their work is a great way to stay connected when your partner travels for work. Even if their work life isn't the most interesting to you, asking about their meetings and daily tasks will help you avoid romanticising their time away. It's easy to let your imagination run wild and assume they're having fun while you're at home holding down the fort. By giving and asking for these small day-to-day details, you're both able to visualise each other's experiences and stay close.
For example, ask them about the people they're working with. Are there any interesting characters they've met? Any challenging personalities they have to navigate? What are their colleagues' roles, and how do they all work together? You could also ask about their daily schedule. Do they have a lot of variety in their tasks, or is it more repetitive? What are some of the challenges they face, and what are some of the unexpected joys? Are there any funny stories or memorable moments they can share with you?
If their work involves a lot of travel, you could ask about the places they're visiting. What are their impressions of the different locations? Are there any interesting cultural differences they've noticed? What are the hotels they stay in like? Do they have any recommendations for places to visit or eat at, based on their experiences?
Remember, too, that work trips aren't always glamorous. Your partner may be dealing with early wake-up calls, delayed flights, jet lag, and late nights. Showing empathy and understanding for these challenges can help strengthen your connection and foster a sense of teamwork.
By asking about their work, you're showing your partner that you're interested in their life, even when they're away. It helps to create a sense of shared experience and can make the distance feel less daunting. So, don't be afraid to ask questions, listen actively, and stay engaged in their work life, even if it might not be the most exciting topic for you. It will make a difference in your relationship!
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Actively listen to your partner
When your partner travels for work, it can be challenging for your relationship. Actively listening to your partner can help you stay connected and nurture your emotional bond. Here are some ways to actively listen and strengthen your connection while your partner is away:
Create a Communication Plan
Before your partner leaves, discuss your communication preferences and expectations. Do you prefer frequent text messages throughout the day, or would you rather have longer phone calls in the evening? By defining the baseline of communication, you can ensure that both of your needs are met and avoid any misunderstandings.
Listen with Empathy
When your partner shares their thoughts and feelings, practice empathetic listening. Put yourself in their shoes and try to understand their experiences and perspective. Recognize that travelling for work is not always glamorous. Your partner may be dealing with jet lag, missing home, or feeling lonely. By understanding their challenges, you can foster a deeper connection and reduce any resentment that may build up.
Minimize Distractions
When you have the opportunity to connect with your partner, ensure that you give them your undivided attention. Put away your phone, turn off the TV, and eliminate any distractions. Focus solely on your partner and what they are saying. Non-verbal cues, such as nodding and maintaining eye contact, can also show your partner that you are engaged and listening attentively.
Ask Open-Ended Questions
Encourage your partner to share their experiences by asking open-ended questions. Show interest in their work and meetings to help ground your partner in reality and avoid romanticizing their activities. Ask about their daily routine, their interactions with colleagues, and any challenges they may be facing. This will help you visualize their experiences and stay connected.
Paraphrase and Summarize
During your conversations, summarize what your partner has shared to show that you are actively listening and understanding their perspective. Paraphrasing also helps ensure that you are both on the same page and prevents any misunderstandings. For example, you can say, "It sounds like you had a challenging day dealing with jet lag and a busy schedule. Is that right?"
Validate Their Feelings
Work trips can evoke various emotions for both of you. Acknowledge and validate your partner's feelings, even if you don't necessarily relate to them. If they express feelings of loneliness or exhaustion, respond with understanding and empathy. You might say, "I can understand why you're feeling that way, and I'm here for you."
Remember, active listening is a skill that takes practice. Be patient with yourself and your partner as you navigate the challenges of having a travelling partner. By incorporating these techniques, you can strengthen your connection and maintain a healthy relationship, even when your partner is away.
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Create rituals around their travel
Travelling for work can be challenging for both the person travelling and their partner. Creating rituals around their travel can help to ease the strain and create a sense of shared routine. Here are some ideas for rituals to incorporate when your partner travels for work:
Help with packing
Offer to help your partner pack their suitcase. This can be a practical way to ensure they have everything they need, and it gives you time to connect before they leave. You could also leave little love notes between their clothes for a sweet surprise when they arrive.
Stay connected
Agree on a communication schedule that works for both of you. This might include daily video calls, voice notes, or text messages. Choose a book or TV show to follow together, so you always have something in common to talk about, even when your schedules differ.
Create romantic rituals
Before your partner leaves, establish some romantic rituals to maintain during their trips. For example, you could send each other funny memes throughout the day to make each other laugh, or agree on a time to share a virtual meal.
Practice self-care
While your partner is away, it's important to take care of yourself. Maintain a routine of mind-body practices such as meditation or yoga to help you stay grounded and calm. Surround yourself with different dimensions of love by connecting with family and friends, and attending community events.
Anticipate their return
Plan something special for when your partner returns. This could be a romantic dinner, a fun activity you both enjoy, or simply setting aside time to reconnect and catch up.
Creating rituals around your partner's work travel can help to ease the strain of being apart and strengthen your connection. These rituals can become something you look forward to and provide a sense of stability during periods of separation.
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Take care of yourself while your partner is away
It can be challenging to keep your relationship strong when your partner travels for work. Here are some tips to help you take care of yourself while your partner is away:
Socialize and Stay Connected
Staying socially active and maintaining connections is crucial for your well-being when your partner is away. Make an effort to get out and interact with others. Set up playdates with friends who have kids, or go out for lunch with your best friends.
Additionally, stay connected with your partner during their travels. Discuss your communication preferences before they leave—some people prefer frequent texts, while others are content with a daily check-in. Utilize technology to stay in touch, such as daily phone calls, video chats, or fun apps like Marco Polo.
Nurture Your Relationship and Avoid Resentment
It's essential to provide unconditional support to your partner and vice versa to avoid feelings of abandonment or neglect. Recognize the challenges they face while travelling, such as tiredness, jet lag, and missing home. Similarly, if you're the one staying at home, acknowledge the difficulties of managing daily tasks and responsibilities alone.
Create Rituals and Special Moments
Develop rituals around your partner's travel to make it more bearable. Help them pack, leave love notes in their luggage, or create a tradition of sending them off at the airport. These rituals can make the transition to long-distance feel more manageable and add a sense of romance to your relationship.
Take Time for Self-Care
Prioritize self-care while your partner is away. This could mean exercising, working on personal projects, reading, or engaging in stress-reducing activities like meditation or yoga. Taking care of yourself will help you stay grounded and manage any anxiety or tension that arises during their absence.
Embrace the Positives of Alone Time
Embrace the benefits of having some time to yourself. Enjoy the freedom to make decisions without consulting someone else, whether it's choosing what to watch on TV or planning your daily schedule. Use this time to pursue hobbies or activities that you might not typically do with your partner.
Remember, it's normal to feel a range of emotions when your partner travels for work. By staying connected, nurturing your relationship, creating rituals, socializing, and practising self-care, you can take care of yourself and navigate this challenging period with resilience and strength.
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Frequently asked questions
It can be hard when your partner travels for work, especially if you have kids. Try to see the positives: you get to be there for all your children's milestones, and your time together as a family is extra special. Make the most of rewards points from your partner's trips to plan family vacations. It's also important to stay connected while they're away, and to be honest about your feelings when they're due to travel.
Before your partner leaves, set aside some quality time to be together. During the trip, make the effort to communicate regularly, whether that's through daily phone calls, video chats, or sending silly videos to each other. You could also establish some shared rituals, like always doing an airport drop-off and pick-up, or leaving love notes in their suitcase.
Remember that travelling for work isn't always glamorous. Your partner is likely to be exhausted from early starts, jet lag, and long days. They may also be feeling lonely and guilty about missing important events. Try to provide each other with unconditional support, and recognise what the other person is contributing to your family.
As well as earning rewards points that can be redeemed for family vacations, your partner's job allows them to see the world, meet interesting people, and expand their horizons. While they're away, you get to spend quality time with your kids and be involved in all the little moments and memories.